Food for Sister
"Ana, please don't go."
I forced my eyes to cry to make sure Ana wouldn't leave me.
"You sure didn't know anything, didn't you?"
I don't understand Ana's words. She shed tears but still decided to leave me. I knew for sure she loved me from her facial expressions.
"Why must we hurt ourselves if we can find a way to solve this and just be happy?"
"Dang it Chris!!" She shouted.
"How insensitive you are Chris."
She cried intensely and left as if she loathed me that much.
I ended up crying on the shoulder of my best friend Lucy. She's been my childhood friend since we moved to the next region because of my Father's job.
I was 7 years old back when Lucy and I first met. I helped her chase the dog away by throwing stones. I noticed Lucy was crying and covering her ears when the dog kept on barking at her. Luckily the dog was scared when I threw a stone.
"You can stop crying now."
"Really?" What a trembling voice and slowly opened her eyes if what I said was true.
"Yeah", I smiled at her.
That's how we started to become friends. We always hung out because their house and ours were not far apart. Just like what children did, we grew up together playing children's games and ended up with classmates too.
As time passed by I thought my feelings towards her would grow. I thought it would be something special but for me it never did. I was sure of it even though I loved to see her around. Most of my classmates and friends thought we were in a relationship but we were not. We're just comfortable that we treated each other like siblings.
In our Senior high, I met Ana and eventually I fell for her. After a month of courtship with the help of my best friend Lucy, Ana accepted my love confession. Though, Lucy was always there for me before Ana arrived and sometimes I asked Lucy to tag along. I didn't think it was unfair to Ana since I asked her first if it was okay for Lucy to come along with us.
I thought they became really good friends as time passed by and hung out together.
"Will you stop this already Chris?"
All of a sudden Lucy woke me up from never-ending thinking while crying.
It's not that Lucy pushed me that hard to ask me to stop leaning on her shoulder. Just a slow one to see our faces and to meet our eyes.
"You still don't get it why Ana decided to leave you?"
I didn't understand what Lucy was trying to say.
"Chris, are you that insensitive or just stupid?"
I left myself wondering while watching Ana.
"Who is a real guy who cried because her girlfriend left her but held his best friend's hand? You know what, I felt guilty for Ana."
She started letting her tears fall one by one.
Yeah, I forgot to notice that Lucy was there when I cried because Ana left. In fact, I held Lucy's hand to grasp strength. I had no idea that it would hurt Ana with that. I was so selfish that I ignored her feelings. Also, I finally realized that I was unfair. I cried because Ana left me but another feeling of me was happy because there was Lucy for me. I didn't give a damn thought that I was happy being left by Ana because I was thinking I could be together with Lucy longer and anytime.
I ignored the fact that sometimes when Lucy gave way for me and Ana to enjoy ourselves with just the two of us made me a little bit lonely. I looked back at Lucy before I convincingly agreed that only Ana and I just spent time together.
"Sorry Lucy, I finally realized."
I stood up with a guilty face facing Lucy.
"I had no idea. I had no idea that I was hurting Ana and above all what hurt me the most was hurting you, my precious friend."
I started to cry not because of the pain that I felt from the disappearance of Ana. I cried because I realized that I cried so much to make sure Lucy would comfort me. I was childish to have the presence of Ana by making her jealous and worried about me.
"It's okay Chris. I'm happy to know that you finally understood what's happening."
I attempted to hug Lucy but I stopped myself because it would be abusive of me to take for granted our friendship.
"It's okay now", she smiled at me and hugged me.
"I don't care if you take advantage of me as long as you don't let yourself cry so much like that."
"Thank you, Lucy. I…"